Mrs.Noreen Henry

by nhenry7773 on Mar. 02, 2013 in Counseling

My daughter is 28 years old.7yrs.ago she started dating her guitar teacher and broke up before leaving for 2 semesters to the Globe Theatre in London.During her stay her ex boyfriend was arrested and convicted for having sex relationships with 2 seniors @ the High School he was teaching. He served 5 years & was released 6 mths.ago.They reconnected & now out of the blue my daughter has decided to move to an apt. up north with him. My husband & I are not happy about this & let her know. I just feel it is a big mistake & don't trust him. I just feel like crying all the time. I'm trying to maintain a good relationship with her,but can't with him. I'm at wit's end. Any suggestions?

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Level 1
Joined: Apr 2012
Mar. 02, 2013

Dear Mrs. Henry,
This is a very difficult situation no doubt.  You are being very wise to maintain a healthy relationship with your daughter.  Besides having you and your husband here are there other things that can keep her from leaving, such as other relationships, a job or school?  If there is little to keep her here it may seem like an adventure for her.  Without exploring and knowing more about your daughter its difficult to guide you in this...whatever the case you are heart broken to see your daughter go off into this relationship with out careful consideration.  I would suggest that you arrange to see a therapist that can explore with you various options. This may be very beneficial to you in handling this situation.   This will help you see things that perhaps you have not seen.  Remember when one is in the mist of a critical situation it is often difficult to see things clearly.
As a therapist I have seen many situations that make a turn in the right direction but what is most significant is that the turn in the right direction come directly from your daughter feeling empowered to make the healthy choice for herself. Also, remember that there are things that you can control and other things that you can not.  You do have control over how you can handle and how you respond to this.
Best wishes,
Iris More, LCSW,Psychotherapist in Miami, Florida

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